It takes Elijah a little time to calm down. There is so much coming at him all at once, and Kyle's question hits him like a ton of bricks. It just smacks him across his face and makes him really think. There are words immediately on his tongue, but he doesn't say them yet, because he wants to make sure that the promise is true-- but then he realizes that right now he can't lie.
Wiping his tears on Kyle's shirt, he turned and pressed a kiss to his lover's neck, and held him close as possible, wishing that they weren't wearing clothes suddenly so that they might be even closer. Skin to skin was an amazing intimacy that Elijah had recently grown accustomed to enjoying in this bed.
"Kyle," He whispered, barely breathing, because what was breath. Truth falling from his lips because it had to. They weren't texting anymore, and closer now it was nigh to impossible to keep anything from the man that he loved so dearly, not that Elijah had ever planned on it.
"Kyle..." He whispered again, and caressed his fingers down Kyle's chest, curling in the fabric of his shirt. "if he left, I would stay here. I meant what I said when I said I don't want to leave here. Even if everyone left- as long as you were here, it would be my home. You are my family, you are my home now. I know this. I have waited a thousand years for you and I will not give you up for any reason, not even Niklaus. I love him, and may have chosen to die with him in my world, but I'm not that person any longer. You wear my ring, and I wear yours."
A few tears ran down Elijah's face as he realized another truth. "I don't want to live at home, if I don't have you, so maybe it's better that I die." He barely said the words, not even sure if Kyle heard them, as horrible as they were, he couldn't deny them.
Elijah swallowed hard, and finally lifted his head to look at Kyle, scared of what he would see for some strange reason. "You don't have to ask me to choose, because I already did. The day I put the ring on your finger, the day I called you soulmate. I chose you Kyle Valenti. Body, Blood, and Soul, I chose you as mine."
Kyle holds him close through it all, even with the pain he feels. For Elijah. For himself. But his attention and his care is on Elijah. Stroking his back, along his arms, knowing he's going through shock and doing what he can to try and help him stay steady. So he touches him to ground him here, listening as best he can and offering the knowledge that he's there. No matter how much things hurt. He's there for Elijah and that's what matters.
His words are like a balm for his soul, helping to calm him, to make it feel like something inside of him is healing, bonded by gold and stronger than before even if he can feel the fear in his bones. The night has rattled him on so many levels but his pain isn't important right now. Elijah's is.
"I want to stay here with you," he whispers, knowing this means that he might well end up working against his friends. Tim and Alex are both working so hard to destroy this place and take it down and send everyone home. Either Kyle can take Elijah with him, especially learning what they have now, or they stay here. He isn't letting Elijah go back to that life. Ever.
"You are my life, Elijah," he whispers, kissing his brow, his cheek, letting what remains of the tears stain his lips. "And no. I can't. I don't want you to go back. Not ever." Even if he knows one day he'll leave Elijah. How could he want to think about him going back to die?
Staring back into Elijah's eyes, nervous still but also so in love with him, wanting to offer him everything he can.
"We have a home here, Elijah. This is our home, our life. You are mine, okay? No matter what happens, what others thinks, you're mine. I will defend that to everyone. I'm willing to do whatever I have to so I can be with you."
Blowing out another shaky breath he just hides himself in the hollow of his lover's embrace. There is nothing here, nothing on any planet, in any dimension that could ever force Elijah to leave Kyle. He will fight tooth and nail to keep what they have, and he will kill if he has to. Tonight though, tonight Elijah is just tired. He's had more truth pulled out of him than he's ever shared before in a thousand years of truth. Never has he been more honest with a world around him, than tonight and it's impossibly frightening to a vampire who has spent a lifetime building walls to protect himself.
"You are my home. You are my life. Body, blood, and soul. Forever." He says the last part of that a few times, like a little mantra of himself to keep him sane as he begins to review his conversation with Hayley, the worst part of the night itself. First he learned of his death, and then he learned the truth that she had been hiding. He felt so unworthy, and just really didn't want to go home to live more than anything, because he was the most unworthy soul. She was right, he broke his vow to her here-- not that he'd change what had happened. How could he when he had Kyle now. But, it made him so much less of the man he had always wanted to be.
Elijah never wanted to see that little truth thing again. It had all but ruined his life today, it had taken his happiness here, and his little honeymoon that he'd been enjoying and ripped it away. It had jammed him right back into his life in New Orleans with all the devilish creatures and truths he had to face about himself.
"I... I tried to kill Hayley. She's my wife, Kyle, and I abandoned her for you. I love you so much that I abandoned my wife. She said that I abandoned her there too. That I left my family, and ran off with another woman, left everyone behind. That I didn't even pick her in my mind. That I ran behind my red door and shut off the world and lived there, and tried to kill her in there. I can't... Kyle. I am a monster. How can you love me?" He blinks, looking at the one he loves more than anything. Pleading his life, and knowing that Kyle will still love him, even though Elijah is having a difficult time loving himself right now.
It's not been centuries, but for Kyle it's still been his lifetime that he's ached to have someone he loves this much. He'll take every moment he has for him, and that means all of the bad with the good. It means being here for him when he's hurting, and when he's coping with their love, and his life, and all he's been through and will likely still go through. He'll do whatever he has to, even as this talk sends those ripples of fear through his gut.
Yet he keeps trying to hold onto those words. "Body, blood, and soul," he whispers softly, needing to hold on to that, to know that he will be there with him. Forever. Or as long as their forever is.
It makes him wince still. Kyle has never been to their world, he barely know Hayley as the best friend to his once upon a time best friend, and yet so many things come back to killing Hayley. And now to Elijah leaving those he loves. Could he leave Kyle? He knows he could. He could leave this place and he'd have no way to follow him. He could chose someone else. Except he can't lie, and he's said it. Home. Life. Forever.
Kyle carefully pulls back so that he can cup Elijah's face in both hands. Cradling his cheekbones so carefully, staring into those beautiful eyes and that strong face.
"I love you, Elijah. I've loved you since before I knew you," he says softly, staring into his eyes still. "I don't know what's going to happen. With this place, with our homes, with who we are and what we've done. What I do know?" He rests his brow to Elijah's. "Is that you're mine, Elijah Mikaelson. I don't expect our life to be easy, but I expect us to get through it. Whatever it takes. Just so long as even when we haven't been bit by little beasts, we're still honest with one another."
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Wiping his tears on Kyle's shirt, he turned and pressed a kiss to his lover's neck, and held him close as possible, wishing that they weren't wearing clothes suddenly so that they might be even closer. Skin to skin was an amazing intimacy that Elijah had recently grown accustomed to enjoying in this bed.
"Kyle," He whispered, barely breathing, because what was breath. Truth falling from his lips because it had to. They weren't texting anymore, and closer now it was nigh to impossible to keep anything from the man that he loved so dearly, not that Elijah had ever planned on it.
"Kyle..." He whispered again, and caressed his fingers down Kyle's chest, curling in the fabric of his shirt. "if he left, I would stay here. I meant what I said when I said I don't want to leave here. Even if everyone left- as long as you were here, it would be my home. You are my family, you are my home now. I know this. I have waited a thousand years for you and I will not give you up for any reason, not even Niklaus. I love him, and may have chosen to die with him in my world, but I'm not that person any longer. You wear my ring, and I wear yours."
A few tears ran down Elijah's face as he realized another truth. "I don't want to live at home, if I don't have you, so maybe it's better that I die." He barely said the words, not even sure if Kyle heard them, as horrible as they were, he couldn't deny them.
Elijah swallowed hard, and finally lifted his head to look at Kyle, scared of what he would see for some strange reason. "You don't have to ask me to choose, because I already did. The day I put the ring on your finger, the day I called you soulmate. I chose you Kyle Valenti. Body, Blood, and Soul, I chose you as mine."
no subject
His words are like a balm for his soul, helping to calm him, to make it feel like something inside of him is healing, bonded by gold and stronger than before even if he can feel the fear in his bones. The night has rattled him on so many levels but his pain isn't important right now. Elijah's is.
"I want to stay here with you," he whispers, knowing this means that he might well end up working against his friends. Tim and Alex are both working so hard to destroy this place and take it down and send everyone home. Either Kyle can take Elijah with him, especially learning what they have now, or they stay here. He isn't letting Elijah go back to that life. Ever.
"You are my life, Elijah," he whispers, kissing his brow, his cheek, letting what remains of the tears stain his lips. "And no. I can't. I don't want you to go back. Not ever." Even if he knows one day he'll leave Elijah. How could he want to think about him going back to die?
Staring back into Elijah's eyes, nervous still but also so in love with him, wanting to offer him everything he can.
"We have a home here, Elijah. This is our home, our life. You are mine, okay? No matter what happens, what others thinks, you're mine. I will defend that to everyone. I'm willing to do whatever I have to so I can be with you."
no subject
"You are my home. You are my life. Body, blood, and soul. Forever." He says the last part of that a few times, like a little mantra of himself to keep him sane as he begins to review his conversation with Hayley, the worst part of the night itself. First he learned of his death, and then he learned the truth that she had been hiding. He felt so unworthy, and just really didn't want to go home to live more than anything, because he was the most unworthy soul. She was right, he broke his vow to her here-- not that he'd change what had happened. How could he when he had Kyle now. But, it made him so much less of the man he had always wanted to be.
Elijah never wanted to see that little truth thing again. It had all but ruined his life today, it had taken his happiness here, and his little honeymoon that he'd been enjoying and ripped it away. It had jammed him right back into his life in New Orleans with all the devilish creatures and truths he had to face about himself.
"I... I tried to kill Hayley. She's my wife, Kyle, and I abandoned her for you. I love you so much that I abandoned my wife. She said that I abandoned her there too. That I left my family, and ran off with another woman, left everyone behind. That I didn't even pick her in my mind. That I ran behind my red door and shut off the world and lived there, and tried to kill her in there. I can't... Kyle. I am a monster. How can you love me?" He blinks, looking at the one he loves more than anything. Pleading his life, and knowing that Kyle will still love him, even though Elijah is having a difficult time loving himself right now.
no subject
Yet he keeps trying to hold onto those words. "Body, blood, and soul," he whispers softly, needing to hold on to that, to know that he will be there with him. Forever. Or as long as their forever is.
It makes him wince still. Kyle has never been to their world, he barely know Hayley as the best friend to his once upon a time best friend, and yet so many things come back to killing Hayley. And now to Elijah leaving those he loves. Could he leave Kyle? He knows he could. He could leave this place and he'd have no way to follow him. He could chose someone else. Except he can't lie, and he's said it. Home. Life. Forever.
Kyle carefully pulls back so that he can cup Elijah's face in both hands. Cradling his cheekbones so carefully, staring into those beautiful eyes and that strong face.
"I love you, Elijah. I've loved you since before I knew you," he says softly, staring into his eyes still. "I don't know what's going to happen. With this place, with our homes, with who we are and what we've done. What I do know?" He rests his brow to Elijah's. "Is that you're mine, Elijah Mikaelson. I don't expect our life to be easy, but I expect us to get through it. Whatever it takes. Just so long as even when we haven't been bit by little beasts, we're still honest with one another."