[ as dumb as it was, Kyle had tried the door and found it locked. He wasn't surprised. Yet he had been so busy with work and his pain and helping others he had what? Missed his last chance to see Nick again? It wasn't as if they weren't both trapped in this city and yet he's sure Nick will see to it. Just like that he was gone and it felt so permanent.
Especially with that next message.
He answers it before he can think.]
im not a good person and maybe i never was.
i hope you find whatever it is youre lookign for.
[ Kyle knows there's no one seeking him out. No one he'll have that time with. He had been right when he had told Michael that he wasn't meant for love, but he had fooled himself again. He needed to accept the truth, no matter how much it hurt. He'd had things fail too many times to think otherwise.]
( this is the part that nick was dreading. he should have waited longer, so he didn't actually have to have the conversation. something caught between guilt and misery shatters, and he's so close to throwing all his resolve away and yanking the door open. he could do it, he could say sorry and beg forgiveness and kyle would probably let him, and they could forget any of this ever happened.
instead he just squeezes the device so tight that his palms ache, feeling a little like he's screaming internally as he runs over the words again and again. because he knows if he opens the door, he'll change his mind, but nick is so convinced that he's making the right choice for all of them. )
it's really not you. it's not. it's me. i need to go. i'm sorry.
( it doesn't make him feel any better, but at least he can try and make sure they're all on the same page about what's happening here. nick is the problem, and he's weeding himself out like a poisonous root. )
![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
no subject
Especially with that next message.
He answers it before he can think.]
im not a good person and maybe i never was.
i hope you find whatever it is youre lookign for.
[ Kyle knows there's no one seeking him out. No one he'll have that time with. He had been right when he had told Michael that he wasn't meant for love, but he had fooled himself again. He needed to accept the truth, no matter how much it hurt. He'd had things fail too many times to think otherwise.]
no subject
instead he just squeezes the device so tight that his palms ache, feeling a little like he's screaming internally as he runs over the words again and again. because he knows if he opens the door, he'll change his mind, but nick is so convinced that he's making the right choice for all of them. )
it's really not you. it's not. it's me. i need to go. i'm sorry.
( it doesn't make him feel any better, but at least he can try and make sure they're all on the same page about what's happening here. nick is the problem, and he's weeding himself out like a poisonous root. )